Kids these days, and the people they grow in to.

Talebearer: a person who spreads gossip, secrets, etc., that may cause trouble or harm.

With the invention of social media came the ability to destroy reputations and livelihoods on a grandiose scale. Unfortunately, along with this came the inability or carelessness of parents to mediate what their children are doing online. While some parents out there still attempt to block or talk with their kids about safety and morals when it comes to the internet; there are still those who look at it as a solution to having to acknowledge a problem.

 I thank my lucky stars that the internet was still in its infancy when I was growing up and in school. We didn’t have cell phones to text with, there were no mass email blasts, and there was definitely no Facebook. I was picked on throughout middle school for being a chubby, little dork with glasses, ratty hair, book smart, and who wore clothes of which they didn’t approve.

It didn’t matter what I did, there were so many days where I wanted or did breakdown and cry due to the abuse I got from classmates and even from those I thought were my friends. Had online social media been around then, I am not sure I would have made it out of middle school as unscathed as I did.

Children now seem to have gained an even crueler streak with rumors and bullying. Cyber bullying has become a trendy fad that we hear about in the news far too often. I found a few sites, much like those that I have been posting in past entries, but rather than directed at office gossip, they are aimed at helping children or young adults deal with nasty chitchat.

This subject is even being addressed in children’s shows, or by family networks. This is a good technique for reaching them. When it seems that children are more glued to the TV, cell phone, and iPods, this may be the only way to get to them. Adults now a-days can’t always relate to what kids are going through, it is a completely different world now. It is tough even for school counselors and teachers to reach out to students to get them to talk. There are some school systems that have laws to try to stop these problems. However, this has been the problems for ages. Past generations can never truly understand what the next gen is experiencing.

One of the articles talks about kids who spread rumors having low self esteems themselves and having to tear others down to make themselves feel better. It is amazing, because through my adulthood I have witnessed these individuals as grownups. It always has made me wonder what their childhood or their personal lives are like for them to turn into such heinous people. The worst part is that when a person gets to be so hateful with their words and actions, it is hard to care what they could possibly be going through outside of the office that would make them need to tear others down.   

When I was in middle school, (my most favorite of past times), I had a group that I sat with everyday at lunch. I thought they were my friends, but eventually found I was mistaken. Each day I would get bumped further down the lunch table, until one day I found myself sitting across from one of the toughest girls in my grade.

That day she was in a dangerously serious bad mood, and I was the little shrimp that was put into just the right place for a beat down. On this very day, she had been told the rumor that there was another girl moving in on her boyfriend and writing terrible things about her on the bathroom wall. She took my moving to sit in front of her to be my admittance to these acts.

She began accosting me with foul language and accusations, the likes of which I could barely fathom. Referencing past entries, I was a tomboy, guys were buds not boyfriend material to me back then. This girl was already several inches taller than most of the grade, was actually pretty when she wasn’t trying to bash your face in, and, well let’s just say she was developed. There was no way a guy was going to look at a dorky pipsqueak like me over her.

She screamed that she knew I wanted “her man” and that there was no way I was getting anywhere near him. She also said she knew what I had written about her in the bathroom and that she was going to redecorate my face for it. Her boyfriend, who had been sitting next to her trying to calm her down, was emphatically insisting that it wasn’t me and he didn’t even know or care who I was.

I remember sitting in terror waiting to be killed at the lunch table, unable to even speak to address the gossip she had been mislead to believe. She lunged across the table at me, but was impeded by her boyfriend who accidently spilled chocolate milk all down her shirt and pants. I was of course also blamed for this.

Now, I have tried my best to forget all things that happened at this time in my life, so I actually had to have my mom remind me what happened to resolve this issue.

I apparently went home and told my parents about the events that had occurred, and had to beg my mother not to talk to the principal about this situation. I assured her that I would handle it.

Within a few days, I was thrown into my locker by this same girl. She was about to knock out my teeth when another girl friend of hers stopped her and told her it wasn’t I she wanted to kill. My attacker quickly demanded I tell her the truth. I explained my innocent side of the story and she was satisfied enough to walk away without murdering me before my first class.

Strangely enough, the next time I was pushed to her end of the table she was completely civilized and kind to me. After that, she actually took me under her overarching, terror-inflicting wing and kept me protected from other dangerous bullies.

I often wonder what became of her ...

It is sometimes very scary to find out you have no idea how a person is going to react to a rumor about them. Another reason why folks shouldn’t start them, it can get dangerous.

It isn't what they say about you, it's what they whisper. ~Errol Flynn